Things vary. And they often vary in relation to the effort I make to stay self-possessed. I aligned and even did a wee bit of energy work this morning, and it’s been better than many Mondays.
It’s weird to imagine an empowered, self-possessed, magical, […] me here. And that’s part of the trap and the inertia I want to counter.
(Thorn’s living situation defixio is a practice that plays upon this notion.)
There are questions of praxis. A narrative-driven, descriptive, adaptive mode seems best.
(Twilight is better for seeing into the Otherworlds, isn’t it?)
There’s also a sense of how I should frame power, magic, action, personality. But there also should exist a link between the spelling and the expression, actualization. I do not want just fiction, or a life in certain contexts (Internet, IRC life, but to be fair, ____ did hone parts of herself there. So did I.)
This started today because I found myself pondering thoughts and utterances,—and the magical, performative, illocutionary power they have, or that I sense they have. I think, in part, that power emerges from the Otherness of the utterance and its meaning from ordinary, established experience. My ordinary, daily utterances and thoughts tend to—diminish or disrupt much of my self-possession, reinforced identities and ways of existing that constrain and subject me. [Other thoughts] feel very liberating and even magical.